It’s Friday, so it’s time to touch base with you… my friends. NO, not just friends, my FAN-FUCKINGTASTIC FRIENDS!

I do love writing these. I force my internal critic to eat a dick and just type whatever the fuck pops into my head. I’m sure it’s safe as no one actually reads this and the few that do probably have a brain similar to mine, god bless you… I love you very much and thank you for following along.

(I finished writing that last sentence 2 hours ago… what have I been doing? I explored the idea of making a mood board of my brain with shit like the 7-11 logo, animated porn, and arcade machines… then gave up.)

I probably have some kind of ADHD. I DO have a form of threshold narcolepsy. If I get too bored, I fall asleep, no matter where I am. Like in meetings or really anywhere… it’s rough. Plus I’m always kind of half asleep, like ALWAYS. It gives life a sort of dream-like quality, but it also sucks to always be ready to nod off.

I have been trying to keep on top of the emails from FFF people that didn’t get one (or more) of the mailers. As always, email me at if you had a problem or want to send me nudes. If you don’t get a response, keep bugging me until I respond… or send YOU nudes. No telling what’s going to happen.

I did receive an awesome email from one Wizarding Mofo… Adam B.! He found a little knockoff product in the wild! What could it be? Who had the mother-fucking audacity to steal ESW art? FIREWORKS!!!! HOLY SHIT, I’m not even mad! Much to our dismay, Adam reported to be underwhelmed by the explosives. His expectation was they would malfunction and create a huge, deadly fireball, killing everyone. But sadly, everyone lived, not so much as a blown-off finger.

Check out the STOLEN glory…

Man, this makes me want to create some rad art and fireworks logos specifically for these overseas bastards to steal! Hit me up with some good ESW-style firework names in the comments (LOOK, I AM ENGAGING YOU!).
I was happy everyone liked the Spellbook from the last update and yes, I AM RAD for giving you the storage box in the KS. I am happy that you’re happy. Recently, some people had the nerve to say I am NOT rad, and that hurts, because I live my life so RADICALLY. Anyway…

Let’s look at one of the Spellbook cards from the upcoming “product.”

It’s the Spellbook for VENTURE the Party Dragon. I like this Champion. You see, his different heads are “RPG dudes” and they are kicking the shit out of “board game dudes”… a rivalry that exists only in my mind. His Familiar is the Dungeon Master, and if you remember, he can trigger MAYHEMS. So looking at this Spellbook, the combo is obvious and obviously FUN. It really leans into the punish and reward your “enemies” (which should be everyone) and allies. It’s ESW… NO ALLIES!!! Hahahah. I can tell you, it’s a pretty fun Spellbook and sets up some big moments.

Love you all,