Create Your Own Wizard

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    If you could design your own oversized wizard and familiar, what would you come up with?

    Mine would be:
    Wizard: Schlong Sultan the Snake Snatcher
    He is the antithesis of Baron Bamboozler the Bum Baron, but instead of embezzling behinds he turns Dongs into snakes and steals them with the use of his;
    Familiar: The Skin Flute
    A erectile recorder not unlike a snake charmers flute, but even more phallic.

    Think the Pied Piper of Hamelin, but instead of rats he has trouser snakes follow in his wake.

    Cory Jones

    hahahah… this awesome and to be clear, all ideas presented on the ESW forum become the legal property of ME in perpetuity and in all know universes and dreamscapes!


    I’m thinking you either use the stolen schlong dong snakes to deal +1 dmg each wizard in the opponents hand, or it just straight up discards them and they’re tossed aside.


    I would go something like Oprah (the old big version) and something like Ellen and another like Drew Barrymore or something. If not Maury, Jerry Springer and Dr Phil.

    Avatar photothe_verTigO

    Why does that create a picture in my mind of a guy standing on a waggon on a parade tossing schlongs to the crowd like candy?


    What about a giant judge with a mullet, leather jacket robes who has two demonic lawyers on chains and flames all around the courtroom? His familiar could be a baliff with twin miniguns for hands that looks like one of those Cyberdemons from Doom


    Ok so I have an Idea for FanFuckingTastic Friends. As a special add on to one of the mailers you could include a voucher to have the recipients likeness made into a card, or you could just use mine. The Wizard would be (name) The FanFuckingTasticly Friendly Wizard.

    the Familliar card would be a bag of Fucks.  Place 6fuck tokens on your wizard. +2 power  / Defense :Whenever an opponent attacks one of your other opponents give the defending player a fuck token and heal them 1. Return bag of fucks to your hand at the end of your turn your hand size is plus 1.When you run out of fucks each wizard takes 2 damage for each fuck token they have. You can only give a fuck for so long until you just don’t give a fuck anymore.

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